Many of us are absolutely obsessed with (and also terrified of) the idea of having the "What are we?" chat with someone we're dating. That's normal. Some people like to define their new relationship, so they know what to expect or can lay out their own expectations. It's how you get what you want, after all. Others seem to be happy to go with it, and see what happens.
But if you're looking for tips on how to bring it up, an AskWomen Reddit thread has explored how different women experienced that (potentially kinda awkward) conversation.
- "We met, we'd hang out on campus to get coffee, and then went on a first date. A week later of lots of hanging out and dates, we made it official. There was a conversation. I think he said something like, 'So, when are we going to level up our relationship status?' and I said, 'Now.' We've been together four years now." [via]
- "It happened without us ever having a conversation; we both just sort of felt like it was understood because things were going so well. I 100 percent think you should have conversations with your partner about these things... but for some reason, I can't bring myself to start conversations about this, I feel like I'm back in high school." [via]
- "We talked about it for an hour or so, and then he asked officially out of formality more than anything. We're both super awkward romance-wise, so we needed it clearly defined." [via]
- "He said, 'I think of you as my girlfriend now' when we were showering together. I thought he was joking or something. A week later, I asked him what we were exactly, and he said, 'I asked you to be my girlfriend last week?' and I was like, 'Oooh... well that's fine.'" [via]
- "I think that my last long-term relationship happened organically. We never thought to define it until someone asked us if we were exclusive, and we were like, yeah." [via]
- "For me, I think it's important to label it so each party knows what's up. For my current relationship, I initiated the, 'What are we?' talk and he asked me to be his girlfriend." [via]
- "I didn't know we were official until my boyfriend mentioned he needed to change his relationship status on Facebook. I was happy but a conversation would've been nice." [via]
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com/uk. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.