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To My Boyfriend’s Best Girl Friend

'You were always just there. And honestly, I didn't mind at first—I actually liked having you around.'
PHOTO: Nick Onken

Hey.

Last night, Miguel told me that you broke up with your boyfriend, and that you needed him to comfort you—that’s why he didn’t show up to our anniversary dinner. He told me how broken you were, and how you just needed him beside you to make you forget the pain.

I was speechless, to be honest. I couldn't wrap my head around what had just happened. I know he was just trying to be a good best friend, but the thing is, you knew it was a special night for us. But still, you did it—again.

We both walked into Miguel's life almost at the same time. I still remember you helped Miguel plan the surprise dinner he had set up the night he asked me to be his girlfriend. I have memories of us hanging out together as we waited for Miguel to finish basketball practice in college. You were always just there. And honestly, I didn't mind at first—I actually liked having you around. We could talk about girly things while Miguel would just roll his eyes. We even called you our "favorite third wheel." 


Then, I slowly started noticing that you kept finding reasons and excuses to alienate me from your friendship with Miguel. I couldn't help but feel like you were slowly pushing me away, and it made me think that you were consistently trying to make him choose you over me. 

Last night, I cried myself to sleep and wondered if I were still as special to Miguel as I thought I was. For so long, I pretended to be okay. I chose to ignore the fact that maybe you were always there because you were secretly wishing that he'd finally pick you over me. And that maybe, you have always been hopelessly in love with him.

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But now, I finally admitted to myself that this isn’t right anymore, and that it’s time to reclaim what I have lost. He may be your best friend, but he is my boyfriend. He is dating me—and not you—for a reason, and you probably need to start realizing that.

I hope you understand that boundaries aren’t set for nothing. I know and acknowledge your presence in his life, but it's time for you to learn that the situation can't be in your favor anymore. There are many things in our relationship that don't involve you, and these are things you frankly have no business to.

I am here. I am in Miguel's life, and I have a special place in it. And I am tired of having to work our relationship around you.