"This has never happened to me before" is a lie.
Here's what guys do to try and avoid that situation in the first place.
1. Masturbate a bunch.
There’s nothing like conditioning, and if he’s got some advanced notice, he can mitigate the issue. Think of it like... peeing before a long road trip.
2. Stop what he's doing entirely.
Whatever the excuse—needing to change positions or get a new condom—stopping momentarily can help him reset, so to speak. He might want to play it coy without you knowing. Or he might want to be up front about it and let you know he’s “edging,” which can make for more intense orgasms for the both of you.
3. Think about something gross or unsexy.
It’s best not to contemplate what exactly a guy will think about to keep himself from finishing too early. The classic go-to is “baseball” but anything that isn’t a turn-on is on the table. A man’s mind can go to some weird and dark places when he’s trying not to orgasm.
4. Switching to a position that doesn’t work as well for him.
This can buy him some time, too. If he can get into a position where the angle just doesn’t do the job, he can take a breather. Hopefully it’s a position you like, though, otherwise you’re both stuck having subpar sex.
5. Slowing things waaaaay down.
If he’s a big fan of fast, passionate sex, he can try and slow things down and get all romantic. He can even tease you a bit and have some fun with it. And all the while, he’s losing that “almost there” feeling.
6. Getting a real thick condom.
You should always be using protection. But if he knows his stamina can be problematic, getting a thicker condom that dulls sensation can be helpful.
7. Flick themselves in the junk.
This one is not recommended, and it’s not even that common (it might not even be that helpful)...but it’s happened. It’s like throwing a bucket of water on someone to wake them up. It’s an uncomfortable jolt for his penis.
8. Using a cock ring.
Cock rings aren’t just for fetish play. He can pop one one (he can even grab one that stimulates you) and increase the length of time he can last.
9. Drag out that foreplay.
He can put off his own stimulation for as long as possible, or even stop sex to say… go down on you again. It gives him a chance to take a break, and you don’t mind because all the attention is on you.
10. Make sure you orgasm quickly.
If you can’t beat them, join them, so to speak. If he knows he’s not going to last much longer, he can put all his focus into making sure that at least you get yours.
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This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.