5 Times It's Totally Okay To Be Selosa

You don't always have to be 'the cool girl.'
PHOTO: Chris Clinton

Nobody wants to be THAT girl—the one who's clingy, naggy, always jealous, paranoid, insecure, and a complete pain in the ass. In this tiring quest to constantly be in a state of "chill lang," we convince ourselves that showing too much emotion, even when we're wronged or neglected, is never okay. Here are situations that totally warrant the jealous reactions you've been trying to suppress. 

1. He doesn't value your opinion as much.

You want to feel like your input matters and that you're heard. We're not saying that he has to run every decision by you, but it's not a good sign when he goes to literally everyone else before you even hear about his problems or concerns. You're supposed to be a team, remember?

2. He doesn't prioritize you.

Independence is an important part of a relationship. But there's a difference between doing your own thing and having to constantly wait around for time with your partner. When he sees his barkada more than he sees you, it's time to bring it up. You have to MAKE time for each other. You should never come in last. 

3. He doesn't respect boundaries. 

You know, in a perfect world, sure, you're all cool with hanging out with "the exes," but this isn't a French film. If he's meeting up with his ex without telling you, that's a red flag. If he insists on hanging out with her even when she's cold towards you or disrespectful of your relationship, that's a red flag. 

4. He criticizes you in public. 

If he constantly compliments other people, but is quick to point out all the wrong things you've been doing, it's understandable to feel jealous and even devalued. If he's capable of saying nice things, why can't he show you the same courtesy?

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5. He keeps comparing you to other women. 

Yes, just because you're in a relationship doesn't mean every person on the planet became unattractive. It's normal to find someone else "hot," but it is absolutely unnecessary and even rude to bring it up every time some leggy brunette walks by. What's worse, though, is when he compares you to his ex. Feel free to shut that down. IMMEDIATELY. 

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