Stop an LQ in its Tracks

Things could get ugly when you and your guy fight. These tricks will put on the breaks when the unavoidable clash happens.

1. Hit the pause switch.
Throwing your guy’s stuff out can feel “cathartic” in the midst of a fight, but instead, Jennifer Baker, PhD, offers a solution: “Instead of engaging in a shouting match, take a 30-minute pause and do your own things. Research has shown it takes half an hour to thoroughly calm down.”

2. Watch your body language.
Body language accounts for 55 percent of the overall message we send out, so don’t cross your arms or roll your eyes. Body language expert Dr. Lillian Glass notes, “Keep a steady gaze, a soft facial expression, and a calm tone.”

3. Pinpoint the cause.
Once you’ve kissed and made up, figure out what set him off. “Learn to understand more about the basis of flare-ups,” says Sue Otter, author of Relationships That Rock. “Read about how to deal with it or, if it’s clearly necessary, take some action.”

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