Earlier in March 2020, Ellen Adarna revealed she received mental health training in Bali, Indonesia. There, she learned how to understand and control her emotions. Naturally, a lot of people had questions about the program she attended; Ellen took to Instagram to explain what the last two to three years have been like for her.
She started the video by introducing the Kokoro Program, which aims to connect "the body, mind, and spirit/soul. They should always be in harmony." After being diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and PTSD, the actress went to therapy, seeing two psychiatrists. Ellen shared, "I was on medications. I was on a lot of tranquilizers. My panic attacks were really, really bad, to the point where my body would shake. I'd puke. At that time, I didn't know what it was because I never had anxiety that serious... I thought I was going to die. Everything was getting hard. My muscles were getting so stiff, and I felt like I couldn’t breathe."
In November 2018, Ellen decided to stop taking her medication. "It just really made me numb. I was always sleeping. I'd wake up, and I'd think about sleeping again. I would eat in bed. I wouldn't even shower for days. When I try to think about [those two years], it's a blur. I basically slept for almost three years," she said in the video.
While the actress decided not to give too many details about what happened, she did reassure her fans that she's "101 percent okay now," adding that she is no longer on meds: "Just love and smiles. I am out of that black hole."